Dear Andrew Marvell,
In addition to having weird, floofy, center-parted hair, you want to get with trees--in the Biblical sense. This is weird. No really, listen to yourself:
Fond lovers, cruel as their flame,
Cut in these trees their mistress' name.
Little, alas, they know or heed,
How far these beauties hers exceed!
Fair trees! wheresoe'er your barks I wound
No name shall but your own be found.
Andrew Marvell, you are such a freak.
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